Intro

I have a confession to make… – I actually began writing this back in March of this year, with the hopes of making a post for the first half of the year, and another for the last half, but alas, that plan completely fell through as it is now November and I’m just now wrapping up this first post. Yikes! All that to say, it’s been a pretty busy, full, and exciting 28th year. I’ve seen God’s lovingkindness in fresh ways, and I’m excited to finish writing what I began months ago in this here blog post. So, let’s dive in, shall we?

This current season of my life has been largely marked by frequent travels and many different journeys. Statistically, since June 2024, I’ve traveled somewhere at least once a month, with only about 3 months without any travel. So lately, I’ve been “the girl on the go,” and while I’ve enjoyed the excitement of it all, there are parts of it that can get tiring or distracting. Nonetheless, I’m thankful I can experience these travels while I still have the opportunity. One of the trips I took last June was a short-term mission trip I applied to partake in. During the application interview, I was asked to share about my faith journey and how I ended up living in my current city. As I recalled the points of this story, I was reminded of a devotional I read in 2022, a few weeks before an interview for the job that would eventually move me to my current city. It was called “Each New Day” by Corrie Ten Boom, and one of the entries was titled “He Makes the Way”, which left a strong impression on me. When I retold this story, I was newly struck by all the ways the Lord has led me thus far, and I trust, the Lord will continue to lead me all the way. I wanted to recount that story here so that future me can reread it and find fresh trust and confidence in the Father’s hand. 

He Makes the Way

A few months after I finished college in December of 2019, a pandemic was on the horizon that would change so much of our everyday lives, human interactions, functions, and relationships for what felt like an eternity. During this time, I was determined to partner with my mom to open a daycare center in our hometown. After a few years of running a home daycare, we were ready to expand and serve more families and children in the community. But, of course, I, like the rest of the world, was blind to the impact this pandemic would have on our societies. A few months later, we were all forced to put our ambitions on hold, and suddenly words like “isolation” and “quarantine” became part of the vocabulary we heard every day. In the following months, everything just… froze. 2 years had passed, and as the pandemic’s impacts eased, I began reassessing my career pursuits and considered pursuing a master’s degree. After researching and talking to many people, I decided to pursue something in technology and design, such as a master’s in Human-Computer Interaction (HCI). After further research, I decided to first pursue a certification in an adjacent field to HCI: User Experience Design (UXD). So I applied to an 8-month UXD program, which was a really cool way to learn new skills. Before completing the program, students were encouraged to start applying for jobs as soon as they had a solid portfolio to showcase their newly acquired technical skills. So I began my job search early in the summer of 2022. In total, I had applied to around 400 jobs all over the country. I was mostly open to relocating to tech-dense cities, such as San Francisco, Austin, Seattle, or Denver. Early in my job search, I landed an internship with a startup, which strengthened my portfolio. November was approaching, and I was still applying for jobs while growing anxious as I neared the end of my program. At this point, no companies were reaching out to me at all, and my inbox was filled with rejections. I became very discouraged as I was around 250+ job applications deep, and all the rejections brought my spirit low. It was immensely discouraging, and I thought I might have taken the wrong step. That November was when a friend lent me the aforementioned devotional by Corrie Ten Boom. Since it was already the end of the year, I wasn’t going to read this devotional in full; therefore, I would just flip to random pages on days when I needed some encouragement. One day that November, I randomly landed on a page in the middle of the book, which was titled “He Makes the Way”. Corrie referred to Psalm 32:8 in this portion, which was the exact encouragement I needed.

Pslams 32:8 ESV

I will instruct you and teach you in the way you should go;
I will counsel you with my eye upon you.

Due to other troubling circumstances that particular day, this verse was just the encouragement I needed, and I immediately made it my prayer. I continued with my job applications and started praying more intentionally and desperately that God would open the right door and give me an opportunity to pivot into this field. Still, nothing was happening for me, and things grew more and more bleak. I was on the verge of giving up at this point. Two months later, in January 2023, I received an email from a hiring manager inviting me to an interview. I had forgotten which job it was for because I had applied to so many. So when I looked back at the application, I saw that the job would be on-site at a military college in a city I had never heard of. I soon found out it was near one of the cities I had prayed for, which got me pretty excited. After my interview, I received a job offer pretty quickly, and within a few short weeks, I was set to start a new life in a city that was very new to me. This move, at the time, was immensely bittersweet but nonetheless a sure answer to prayer. I landed in the new city on Valentine’s Day that new year, which was the beginning of many adventures to come.

Who is in Control?

I started writing this on a flight to D.C., and somehow it is mostly when I’m sitting in an airplane, thirty thousand feet up in the sky, that I am so utterly reminded of how much I am not in control and how much God is. When I am not on a plane, living my mundane everyday life, with all my little choices, this fact isn’t so much at the forefront of my mind as it is in those moments on a plane. Every so often, I still do get nervous on flights, but when I meditate on this truth, it gives me peace. But just like on that plane, or during that pandemic, or during my days of endless job searching and amidst all wearisome striving, God has been in control. Even now, this speaks strongly to me, showing my need for gospel truths every single day. It’s so easy to know something in your head, but sometimes, it takes personal hardship, challenges, and experiences to know it in the depths of your heart. During that time, I learned firsthand that God is in control and that we can trust Him with our needs. J.I. Packer writes in his book “Knowing God” that

“It is as false as it is irreverent to accuse God of forgetting, or overlooking, or losing interest in, the state and needs of his own people. If you have been resigning yourself to the thought that God has left you high and dry, seek grace to be ashamed of yourself. Such unbelieving pessimism deeply dishonors our great God and Savior.” I hope you are encouraged to keep trusting God for all things.”

Conslusion

Now, I could add more about how this year actually went, but it will suffice to say, the more I grow, the more I see my need for Jesus, and that knowing Him is everything. In this season, in all the hustle and bustle and flight catching and serving, it’s been me and my Lord, going everywhere together, and that has been sweet. Realizing that He is my constant friend, I feel such sweet care! I hope you’re encouraged to want to know Him more and more. I’ll be turning 29 in just a few, and as I’ve been reflecting on the past few years, I can see that the story I recounted here was a very real instance of the Lord leading me. Of all the jobs I applied for, which could have taken me to many different places, God brought me here. And it’s been so good for me. There are many other examples of His leading throughout my life, and I’m comforted and feel shepherded when I recall His hand upon this little life of mine. I can only lean into trusting Him more, although the enemy often tempts me in a different direction. And yet, He sustains me. In the coming year, I’ll have the chance to go to places I’ve never been, and I hope to continue to be a vessel for His work wherever I pass through. Sometimes I get sad that I am getting older, but then I remember: it is such a privilege for me to get to grow older. All the versions of me that have existed over the last 8 years have brought me to who I am today, and God has been with me, leading me and guiding me throughout it all.

Until next time:)

Jesus, Jesus, how I trust Him!
How I’ve proved Him o’er and o’er;
Jesus, Jesus, precious Jesus!
Oh, for grace to trust Him more!

In Christ,

Christelle Kanku Panumpabi